Get that, would you Barb?

Are you going to make a brew or what Barbara?  I’ve got a throat here like Gandhi’s bloody flip-flop.

Just one more for the road before we return to normality – another Royle Family quote, of which there are so many (and some I probably should not print, given the language content, but they are all so funny)

The Royle Family

Another Jim Royle special (I must get some other quotes from the rest of the family), but so much of it revolves around him, just sitting in the same old chair, in the same old dilapidated room, saying the same old things.  It is really a wonder why The Royle family became such a huge hit with audiences … but it did!  My Arse!

UKCQ 😀

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Stop fiddling with yourself!

I paid a quid for these underpants and I’ve got about 50 pence worth stuck up me arse!

Sorry, but I could not resist another Royle Family quote, of which there are many

Jim Royle

Brilliant delivery and timing goes to make this a bit of pure sensational comedy from the cast of the Royle Family.  Famed for picking at his body parts, Jim explodes with this witty retort when his daughter, Denise, suggests he should stop doing this.

The whole quote goes as follows:

Denise Royle:  Dad, stop fiddling with yourself.

Jim Royle:  I’m not fiddling with meself, I paid a quid for these underpants and I’ve got about 50 pence worth stuck up me arse.

Barbara Royle:  She’s right. If you’re not picking your arse, you’re picking your teeth.

Jim Royle:  I’ll pick what I want in me own house and when she gets her own house she can pick what she likes – her nose, her arse, her teeth. Just go and treat yourself.

Barbara Royle:  Oh, I’m ashamed of this family, I am really.

UKCQ 😀

A Royle party

I’m off for a chat with the Arabs … Mustafa Crap

With a hint of vulgarity the Royal Family arrives at last into this blog.  A personal family favourite this Liverpudlian family depicts life as seen around the living room TV, couch potatoes in other words.

Jim Royle

How can such a simple, almost boring set give rise to such great comedy?  Great writing and an excellent cast is the answer!  Jim Royle, played by Ricky Tomlinson, belches, farts, picks his nose and his backside, but life revolves around him and woe betide you if you cross him!  My Arse!!!

UKCDQ 😀

You’ll like this – not a lot

So, what first attracted you to the millionaire Paul Daniels?

Brutal, intelligent comedy, delivered straight-faced and directed straight at the recipient of the joke.  The Mrs Merton Show produced some timeless comedy, of which this quote stands out a mile.

Mrs Merton

With Debbie McGee, the beautiful young blonde in the firing line, there can be no better way to ask the question that everyone thought, but nobody would say.  Why was she attracted to a 20 years older Paul Daniels?  To Debbie’s great credit she took this on the chin and laughed along with everyone.

UKCQ 😀