Not Only… But Also

You know, I go to the theatre to be entertained.ย  I donโ€™t want to see plays about rape, sodomy and drug addiction…I can get all that at home.

Not satirical, just a good old fashion gag, from the godfather of British Satire – Peter Cook

Peter Cook

I’d rather not quote other people, but I find it hard not to with Peter; so many people have great things to say about him.ย  So, from Stephen Fry we have this testament to Peter’s greatness:

“There was the famous occasion when Peter addressed a group of revellers at a lunch celebrating 25 years of Private Eye. Almost everyone who was there, myself included, will tell you it was the funniest, most brilliant speech they had ever heard. But ask us to recall the jokes and there will be a complete blank. Peter’s funniest performances were generally of this impromptu, unscripted variety.”

’nuff said

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The funniest man

I’ve always been after the trappings of great luxury.ย  But all I’ve got hold of are the trappings of great poverty.ย  I’ve got hold of the wrong load of trappings, and a rotten load they are too, ones I could have very well done without.

Something a bit older now from an extremely influential figure in modern British comedy; someone who was regarded as the leading light of the British satire boom of the 1960’s

Peter Cook

Peter Cook has been described by Stephen Fry, no less, as “the funniest man who ever drew breath” – a tremendous accolade by someone I consider as incredibly influential in the modern era of comedy – so great heed should be taken of this

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Upper-class versus Nouveau Riche

My Grandfather used to have his eggs timed by the passing trains.ย ย  If they were hard-boiled he had the driver sacked.

Here is a past classic sitcom – a riches-to-rags-to-riches romantic tale of Audrey fforbes-Hamilton, and the new owner of the stately home she had to sell, Richard DeVere.

Penelope Keith and Peter Bowles played the two leading characters and was extremely popular, even though it only lasted 22 shows over 3 series.ย  To the Manor Born came 21st in Britain’s Best Sitcom, a public poll to find Britain’s favourite situation comedy

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Feline frolics

If my pussy isn’t attended to by eight, she needs a right stroking all night!

One final quote from Are you Being Served.ย  Mrs Slocombe was famous for one thing and that was her … cat (a.k.a. pussy).ย  So many innuendos were in Are You Being Served from many of the characters, it is Mrs Slocombe’s regular referral to her…cat, that is most fondly remembered (or should it be fondling…)

Mrs Slocombe

Mrs Slocombe was head of the ladies’ department and was as well-known for her changing hair colour as well as conversations about her… cat

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As a comedian, I’ve died many deaths

I’m not saying my wife’s a bad cook, but she uses a smoke alarm as a timer.

Ha ha – yes, another quip from a true master of the ad-lib

Bob Monkhouse

On 12 June 2007, Monkhouse posthumously appeared on a British TV advertisement promoting awareness of prostate cancer for Male Cancer Awareness Week.ย  He talking about the disease seriously, interspersed with humorous asides such as “What killed me kills one man per hour in Britain. That’s even more than my wife’s cooking” – a true master of comedy if ever there was one.

The title of this post came from the prostate cancer advert

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A fresh serving of fruit

MRS. SLOCOMBE: Well, you are what you eat.
MR. LUCAS: How long have you been eating sour grapes and ugli fruit?

Very cutting.ย  Another quick-witted reply from the young Mr Lucas in Are You Being Served.

Are You Being Served

Such was the success of the program, one film was released using the same characters and cast; the fictional Costa Plonka was the resort; where else could it have been?

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More from the Full House

My wife said: “Can my mother come down for the weekend?” So I said “Why?” and she said “Well, she’s been up on the roof two weeks already”.

Back to some good old gags now from one of the best in the business, Bob Monkhouse

Bob Monkhouse was a respected stand-up comedian and especially known for his talent at ad-lib and TV shows.ย ย  He was awarded the Lifetime Achievement for Comedy honour in 1995 and was voted one of the top 50 comedy acts in 2005.

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And I am unanimous in this!

MRS. SLOCOMBE: That’s how I met my husband, during an air raid. The bombs were raining down and I saw his face lit by an incendiary. He threw me on my face and said, look out, here comes a big one!
MR. LUCAS: I suppose there wasn’t much time for chatting in those days.

Ha ha!ย  Another double entendre from this classic British comedy, first making its TV appearance in the 1970’s

Are You Being Served

Mr Lucas, who was regularly put down by the more senior members of staff, was young, penniless, womanising junior salesman.ย  He usually had some witty retort, as shown above.

And the title of this post… one of Mrs Slocombe’s many infamous quotes.

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Menswear

I had just bent down to tighten my nuts, and there was a double yellow line, see? And next thing I knew, there was policeman behind me. He put a sticker on my helmet and tried to clamp me.

Fondly remembered, this sitcom was full of sexual innuendo and easy to identify characters.ย  Set in Grace Brothers, a fictional London department store, Are You Being Served lasted for 69 episodes over 10 years.

Mr Humphries

The show is remembered for its prolific use of double entendres with the base of the series making fun of the British class system.ย  The above quote from the “camp” Mr Humphries was arrived at whilst he was discussing having to hang onto backs of buses and skateboard to Grace Brothers to save money.

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A sensitive Glaswegian

If the Good Lord had wanted us to know about cuisine, he would never have given us crispy pancakes.

This dirty, rude, lazy, foul-mouthed, sexist, violent, alcoholic appeared on our screens in the 80’s and is still going strong.ย  Tackling many taboo subjects, Rab C Nesbitt reeks of dark, Glaswegian humour, when you can understand the heavy dialect (which actually makes it even funnier).

Rab C Nesbitt

It has been voted one of the 50 Best British sitcoms of all time in a wide-ranging poll of the viewing public.ย  Opinion can be divided though;ย  love it or hate it the performance if Gregor Fisher is fantastic.

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